the biggest mistake I made in my marriage

the biggest mistake I made in my marriage

In my 20s my first marriage started to fall apart.

It was obviously a very sad time as I honestly thought he was the one. However I was also relieved.

My husband’s family was toxic. I was finding it very stressful, looking for an easier life and not having to deal with them. I also remember thinking “thank goodness I will not have to pick up his clothes from the bedroom floor”.

Reflecting on the lessons learnt from my first marriage I married for a second time in my 30s. My second husband had no family near us and with my family over 4,000klms away it certainly made it easier.

We set up a joint bank account. This was done without any thought. It was how my parents had done it and I had done it in my first marriage.

Looking back this is the biggest mistake I made and it has caused stress for me throughout our marriage. I took on the responsibility of managing the finances. I didn’t really mind as it was something that I really enjoyed.

The stress however came when my husband would come home with a new outfit for our daughter or I tried to set a weekly splurge budget of $20 each per week. $20 is not enough said my husband. But when we add it up ($40 * 52) is $2,080 per year. 2 week’s wages!

If you are marrying later in life. it has been referred to as sexually transmitted debt.

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